I Love That Pokemon Exists

There are times where I turn on something relaxing and comfortable to watch as I fall asleep on my bed. It’s weird that I don’t usually do this but as I finish the Pokemon movie: Volcanion and the Mechanical Marvel I am realizing that I should be doing it more often. Granted, I am not a veteran watcher of the Pokemon series. I’ve watched a handful movies and only completed, like, 2 series. Which is a lot, to be fair. But I barely consider myself a casual fan. I don’t often spend my days thinking about Pokemon. I don’t contribute to the community. I don’t have any special feelings towards any character. If anything, I have a little disdain for Ash because of how putridly non-progressive his character is. But for the most part, I don’t really care. I don’t even play the games. I get bored of them. 

But the conceptualization of Pokemon is one that’ll remain in our world for decades to come. Maybe even past a century! I don’t think it’s because it’s prevalent in our lives. It’s just one of those amazingly harmless ideas that’s just good to have and that’s so whimsically fun. Sure, they’re making Pikachu clones and all sorts of corporative decisions that, for good reason, causes the fanbase to fluster in rage but nobody’s going to be outright upset at Pokemon’s existence. Because Pokemon represents a kind of togetherness akin to having a dog or a cat or even a hamster! Even if you don’t like having pets then you’re probably that guy that always admires animals from a distance. By the way, what the fuck man? At least get a goldfish. Seriously..? God!

Pokemon serves some of the best eye-candy in general. I feel nothing but contentedness whenever I lay my eyes upon adorably unique creatures. I saw Amaura for the first time in this film and while I wouldn’t say its existence overwhelmed me with glee; I couldn’t help but feel happy at the sight of it. Knowing this is something that so many other people probably gravitate towards like it’s the most blessed thing in the universe. And I am laying here smiling at the fact that this little guy that radiates such a joyous aura will do no wrong. There’s so few things that can achieve that kind of neutral positive and I think we take that for granted, sometimes. Now, I can turn on anything Pokemon related before I go to bed. Seeing as I wake up feeling a lot more refreshed because of it. As far as my review of the actual film: I thought it was surprisingly okay. A lot of people wanna insist on the narrative that Pokemon films have devolved as they keep churning them out. I don’t necessarily disagree but I think it’s ignorant to say they’ve steadily declined one after another. 

Giratina and the Sky Warrior was seemingly underappreciated. Jirachi the Wish Maker was the 6th installment yet I can think of a handful of films that came after that I feel were superior in almost every way. Volcanion and the Mechanical Marvel being one of them. My favorite part of these films is how they consistently try to create a new and rich setting within each and every one of them. Not all of them live up to their potential in that regard. Volcanion and the Mechanical Marvel is, unfortunately, in that bracket. However, I will always remember the beautiful Venice aesthetic of Latias to Latios or the child-like dreamworld of Spell of the Unown. Hell! A lot of people didn’t like Destiny Deoxys’ high-tech city but I felt it was marvelous even if the film itself ended up boring me. 

Volcanion, the Pokemon itself, did not satisfy me. From a design perspective he was fine it’s just his character is cliche. He’s that Pokemon that was betrayed by humans and gathered a society of Pokemon that felt they were equally betrayed. Ignorantly believing that all humans are bad because of his personal experiences with a small portion of them. Wait so it’s basically r/anime? Kidding… It’s more like r/League of Legends. I will say that this one is special. Because Volcanion and Magearna are obviously fucking! There’s not a single doubt in my mind; they fuuuuuuck! And it’s fascinating because one of the most boring things in the world is intercourse between a man and a woman. There’s a few set ways it can be performed and it’s very limited. Maybe with the addition of intricately weird fetishes it can be spiced up but there’s only so much a human is willing to do. It’s more work than it’s worth! When it comes to Pokemon having sex it adds a large variety into the activity. I can’t even imagine how Volcanion and Magearna perform the act but all I know is that i’m trolling. Good night everyone and keep watching Pokemon!


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